10 months ago, Camilla was headed into surgery. We were about to welcome our 5th son into the world through C-Section. We had prayed very hard every day and every night about this little one- pleading with God on our knees to give us a healthy child. We had our reservations- the signs were there in a lack of movement in Camilla’s womb, but still we persisted in our prayers in anticipation of a healthy little boy. Surely the LORD would have mercy and wouldn’t give us another child who would die, just like our 3rd son.
Yet when little Theo was born, he had all the same symptoms of the condition that killed our son Joshua. The PTSD came on at full force and we wondered how God could allow this to happen yet again. Once again we were spending week after week in the Intensive Care Units at Shands Hospital in Gainesville, with our family separated and our baby fighting for his life. There were several close calls during this time and especially when he developed sepsis last summer and almost died from the infection.
Yet when little Theo was born, he had all the same symptoms of the condition that killed our son Joshua. The PTSD came on at full force and we wondered how God could allow this to happen yet again. Once again we were spending week after week in the Intensive Care Units at Shands Hospital in Gainesville, with our family separated and our baby fighting for his life. There were several close calls during this time and especially when he developed sepsis last summer and almost died from the infection.
In public, I did my best to put on a brave face and just complete the tasks in front of me. I had to. But it is hard to put into words just how difficult this time was. And still is. We prayed for a healthy son and God did not answer that request. Providentially, he is currently growing and doing well, but he has a difficult road in front of him, and we do too as his family. He requires 24/7 nursing care with special treatments, and isn’t able to breath or eat without assistance. We now live with the constant tension that on any given day Theo may take a turn for the worse and upend all of our plans. And of course ruined plans are the least of our worries in these situations. The last couple of weekends we’ve had to make emergency trips to the hospital, and this is just a new normal for us. We can’t leave the state without him and can’t travel with him. Things are different now.
Little Theo has changed our lives for the better and I wouldn’t change anything about him. He is fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. Yet every time I see him, I just wish God would have answered our prayers for a healthy child so that Theo could have the same freedoms and opportunities as the other children his age. But that was not God’s plan for Theo.
Sometimes the divine nos that we receive have lasting consequences. Why did we get this sickness, why did this debilitating accident occur, why did that person make that decision we prayed so hard against- and we are regularly reminded that God did not answer the prayers as we wanted. What do we do with these apparent rejections, and how do we move forward embracing that this is God’s plan for our lives?
This weekend we will look at a divine no that was given to King David, despite his fervent prayers. How David responded serves as a model that we can follow today.
I invite you to join with us this weekend as we explore 1 Samuel 12:1-25. Our Saturday service is 3:30 in the afternoon and our Sunday morning service is at 10:15, where you can join us online or in person. We also have Sunday School classes at 9 for all ages.
Have a great weekend and I look forward to pursuing Christ, Community, and the Great Commission Together with you soon!
-Pastor Nathan Rice